Feeling dull today. Gloomy just like the skies, as the weather is still unpredictable as well as my mood since I viewed my account this morning and saw my bloody red portfolio on my share holdings. Damn.
Later that day, I was supposed to go outside and meet someone for dinner, but changed my mind in an instant, i cleaned my room instead. Its always been a outlet for me to sweat out my annoyed soul. The conversation that started as a simple text message ended up into heated banter again. Just that I realized again for the nth time, what made me a monster today?
Could I blame it on my PMS (pre-menstrual syndrome) since yesterday? The intolerable pain on my lower torso, that's been slaving me to Ibupropen for the past 2 decades of my life? Plus the perks of headache, nausiness and acidity associated with it.
Or could it be on the down shares I availed recently? This morning, it was jockeyed lower into all other holder's terror. Too late for me to cut loss then. One holding that's been added again on my lists for a longer term harvest.Talk about patience, tsk tsk.
Or, just things didn't went out as what I expect? There has been arguments again between me and him. As oppose to what "some" friends and family members see me as a normal girl, B really brought out the better, sweeter and also the monster of me. Our heated discussion went again from a simple catching on a day's work to the nth time of topics on prioritizing things. Brought out on a norm living, sorrounded by good-natured friends, developed my attitude of expecting things as they are planned on. I'm currently into a relationship testing the waters of endurance, patience, understanding and acceptance. He's still a different person and has been like that before we even met. I'm still on the amateur part despite the 5year term, perhaps to stitch the seventh year line? Until when will I learn to accept, and until when He'll understand?
Let's see on what painkillers and the market movements can do tomorrow. Should the typhoon winds change direction heading to calm, so is my agitated mood to relax. Care for a mood management with me?